The author of this week's guest column is Gary Conklin, who teaches US. history and economics at Louisville, Kentucky. "Talking to a Teacher" first appeared in the (Louisville) Courier-Journal, August 18, 1994.
Teaching is a profession, not just a temporary stop on the way to real life.
Mid-August is back-to-school time. Book bags are stuffed with calculators, colorful folders, pencils, and paper of pure white. Trips to the shopping malls are adventures in current style. (Is grunge still in?) Classrooms are carefully prepared.
It is the start of another nine-month journey that for everyone involved - students, parents, and teachers - is guaranteed to be unique, unlike any that has gone before.
One area of preparation, however, suffers from neglect: understanding how adults should interact with teachers. So as a public service, I offer the following suggestions on how to talk to a teacher -- any teacher, not just your child's teacher.
When you run into an acquaintance who you know has been teaching, do not say, "So, are you still a teacher?" Of all the subtle and unintended indignities a teacher must endure, that, to me, is the worst. Do you ask, "Are you still a surgeon?" Or, "Are you still a corporate litigator?"
Of course not. Teaching is a profession, not just a temporary stop on the way to real life. The "Are you still" question implies that teachers are just highly educated temps, and that once the idealism, independence, and energy of youth are replaced by cynicism, debt, and exhaustion, we will move on to something more rewarding. Indeed, some do move on, but most of us -- the best of us -- are in for the duration. Respect that commitment.
Do not feel sorry for teachers. True, it is a very hard job, but every school is not filled with doped-up, gun-toting, out-of-control kids. Every parent does not blame the teacher when little Billy fails a test. Yes, I work in a private school, so I have fewer of the problems that afflict my friends in the public sector, but those friends consistently indicate that we share the same positive feelings about our jobs: We like our students, the parents are supportive, and we are proud of the job we do.
Teachers are human. We have lives outside of school, so don't feel you have the right to call us at home at any hour to discuss why Sally is getting only an A and not an A+ in history. And it is true that teachers are expected to be "moral exemplars," and we don't mind being role models, but we signed on to teach your children, not to raise them; parenting is for parents.
A word about money: Don't substitute platitudes and tokens for decent pay. Teacher compensation has improved significantly in recent years, but it still lags behind other comparable professions. We know we are appreciated -- but you can't take warm fuzzies to the bank. We like but don't need any more plaques, coffee mugs, or fruit baskets at Christmas. And we know we "touch the future." (So does the plumber, but he or she makes more doing it.) In place of rhetoric and gifts, we would rather have your support in efforts to continue to improve compensation.
Art Linkletter, a television personality in the 1950s, used to have children appear on the show, and he compiled their witticisms into a book titled Kids Say the Darndest Things. You better believe they do, so don't be alarmed when your child reports that his or her teacher said or did something outrageous. Elementary grade students will tell you everything, but they will get it wrong. "Eric Clapton is a guitar god," becomes "Mr. Hendricks said that Eric Clapton is God." Middle school students will tell you almost nothing about school or anything else, but high school students will tell you just what serves their purpose: "You have two months to read War and Peace" becomes "Mr. Marshall said we had to read War and Peace by Monday!"
Be a little skeptical when your child talks about what goes on in school, and remember this: Your child tells us everything about you.
And finally, when you have a concern, please first contact the teacher at school and avoid the temptation to go directly to the highest level of administration that you can reach. Respect and acknowledge the teacher's willingness to meet with you and discuss any concern.
I hope everyone has a great school year. And next summer I hope my friends will greet me with a simple, "How is your teaching going?"